I got a chance to meet up with my childhood friend from kindergarten days to elementary days.. pretty much grew up together (only until 3rd grade.)
It was the craziest and weirdest (and the fastest) time spent in a really long time.
for me, it was like finding my past. facing it again.. because it's been such a long time, I forget sometimes that I was born in Seoul - grew up here, dug up dirts and built my home in the playgrounds, made my mark rollerbladin throughout the neighborhood.. I got my scars here - the scars on my knees. Few times throughout the years I've visited the neighborhood, it felt the same, but it changed and I often felt like a different person .. like I can see the little girl version of myself walking around right in front of me- like it's hard to believe that's me .
but meeting with minsoo was surreal - his stories of me - his images of me, what he remembers from the past.. seeing my friend grown up and right in front of me, it was surreal. through his presence, I truly felt like my child self- like that little girl I've missed has been me this whole time. I can't explain it.. each time he said my name, I was her. I was her.
It's insane how much I have forgotten. I literally forgot everything and everyone but him and another friend of mine. I remember a few names, but I can hardly recall anything but a few moments that are quite insignificant.. I think moving to the united states was such a crazy concept for me to grasp at a young age that while trying to adapt to a new life, I inevitably learned to forget the other. I had to - the life I loved so much, I had to let go in order to let a new one in. ..
and all of this reminds me once again, how much I have to lose to gain another.. like if I were to live in Korea, I'd have to let go of my life in Cali... if I want to live in Cali, I have to learn to let go of my korean life. but man, only if I could know how much each is worth... without experiencing it first.
struggles of an immigrant.
It was the craziest and weirdest (and the fastest) time spent in a really long time.
for me, it was like finding my past. facing it again.. because it's been such a long time, I forget sometimes that I was born in Seoul - grew up here, dug up dirts and built my home in the playgrounds, made my mark rollerbladin throughout the neighborhood.. I got my scars here - the scars on my knees. Few times throughout the years I've visited the neighborhood, it felt the same, but it changed and I often felt like a different person .. like I can see the little girl version of myself walking around right in front of me- like it's hard to believe that's me .
but meeting with minsoo was surreal - his stories of me - his images of me, what he remembers from the past.. seeing my friend grown up and right in front of me, it was surreal. through his presence, I truly felt like my child self- like that little girl I've missed has been me this whole time. I can't explain it.. each time he said my name, I was her. I was her.
It's insane how much I have forgotten. I literally forgot everything and everyone but him and another friend of mine. I remember a few names, but I can hardly recall anything but a few moments that are quite insignificant.. I think moving to the united states was such a crazy concept for me to grasp at a young age that while trying to adapt to a new life, I inevitably learned to forget the other. I had to - the life I loved so much, I had to let go in order to let a new one in. ..
and all of this reminds me once again, how much I have to lose to gain another.. like if I were to live in Korea, I'd have to let go of my life in Cali... if I want to live in Cali, I have to learn to let go of my korean life. but man, only if I could know how much each is worth... without experiencing it first.
struggles of an immigrant.
posted by DINAKIM. at
11:31 PM
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